By: Frank Michels
I’ve been listening to the male country songs that are on the radio right now, and a few things are becoming clear. Even though I’ve been writing songs for about 30 years, I now realize that I am lacking some of the prerequisites for success on the country charts. For instance…
I don’t own nearly enough firearms.
- “Rifle in a gun rack hanging in the back glass” (Backwoods)
- “An F-150 and a 30-ought-6” (Hillbilly Bone)
- “Our houses are protected by the good Lord and a gun” (Way Out Here)
I haven’t gone fishing for about five years.
- “On their way to work they might stop by a fishin’ hole” (That’s how Country Boys Roll)
- “A creek bank and some cane poles, catching channel cat” (I’m a Little More Country than That)
I haven’t been drinking enough.
- “Hold up your cup and take another swig” (Bonfire)
- “Red clay country mud sippin’ on a cold Bud” (Backwoods)
- “Whiskey makes my baby feel a little frisky” (Rain is a Good Thing)
- “Weekends they barbecue and have a cold one” (That’s How Country Boys Roll)
- “My buddies pile up in my truck” (Rain is a Good Thing)
- “The roads are dirt and our trucks ain’t clean” (Way Out Here)
- “There’s mud covered trucks and SUV’s” (Bonfire)
- “35’s and a lift kit how stuck can you get” (Backwoods)
I don’t have the right kind of dog.
- “Blue tick coon hound you know when I’m found” (Backwoods)
- “Picture a small town with an old hound” (I’m a Little More Country than That)
I don’t have enough reverence for name-checking the icons of country.
- “They love momma and Jesus and Jones” (That’s How Country Boys Roll)
- “Just worry about John Wayne, Johnny Cash and John Deere” (Way Out Here)
- “Think of a Hank song from days gone” (I’m a Little More Country Than That)
It’s obvious what I have to do. I’m selling my comfortable home in the suburbs of Nashville, and I’m moving to a shack down a dirt road in Cheatham County. I’m gonna buy a mud-covered pickup truck, with a gun rack of course, and fishing poles sticking out the back, along with my pair of coon hounds. I’ll need a good supply of baseball caps with the names of feed stores on them. And, this is going to be tough, I’m going to have to start chewing tobacco to get that “Skoal ring” in my jeans pocket.
That hit country song is going to write itself!
About the Author:
Frank Michels is a multi-instrumentalist who has spent the last 25 years performing with such country stars as Brenda Lee, Tanya Tucker, Deborah Allen, Michelle Wright, and Ronnie McDowell. As a songwriter he acts as the Vice President for an independent publishers group here in Nashville. He also operates a successful demo business that produces quality recordings within reasonable budgets. Visit his site now
“Backwoods” Justin Moore
“Hillbilly Bone” Blake Shelton
“Way Out Here” Josh Thompson
“That’s How Country Boys Roll” Billy Currington
“I’m a Little More Country than That” Easton Corbin
“Bonfire” Craig Morgan
“Rain is a Good Thing” Luke Bryan